Some Updates~ For now.

Well, i dont know what has got into me. i guess i am just a bit stressed out
one of the side effects of stress is being overly emotional... and for those of u who knows me quite well will know that i am emotional, regardless whether or not i am under stress or pressure. so can even begin to imagen the state i am in now? i can bring myself in tears no matter what i do.. i can cry in things on newpaper, emails from friends, TV Series (has any one ever cried while watching Smallville?!?! it's rediculous!), and even just sitting and thinking can get me watery eyes.

for those of you who have read my previous post "Guys with strange effects" will know what i am talking about when i say, Guy #3.

During my First Exam:
(also in xanga) {i went in, sat down, looked around.. all those ppl ~ i turned around and he was sitting there. he saw me and smiled (one of those smiles that makes you think that there can be nothing wrong in the world) he mouthed "Good Luck" and smiled some more. i smiled back and mouthed "thank you, u too!" and turned around. }

(not in Xanga) { i know, like i said. he's got a gf... but MAN do i wish his gf was prettier... lol he deserve much better... he's not like HOT, where when you see him right away u go "god he's cute" he's nothing like that. he sorta just grows on you.
he's got this Amazing smile... he doesnt give those half/ quick smiles, when he smiles he gives it fully. (do i make sense do u know what i mean?) just none of that half hearted smiles. when he sees u and smiles, it's like u were the person he wanted to see most, and that he's so glad he saw you.
even during the exam his smiles makes it seem like, there is no trouble in the world and that the exam means nothing. (well probably not to him, he's so smart.) but all the same, it really rubs off on you, and makes you feel like everything is going to be alright, even the exam. sometimes, just sometimes, i wish he didnt have to be so damn nice. lol ~ we are gonna stay friends for a REALLY long time lol ~I Hope.}

Guy #2 just talked to me on msn and asked me to teach him Econ tomorrow...
i dont kow what i can teach him.. i didnt do so great on the midterm.. to be exact i failed it lol (thought the class average ws 53...) still.. it felt really bad that i didnt at least past concidering that i did Econ for 2 years in IB... it felt like i wasted 2 years...
about him... ~ well... i dont know... i kinda figure that it's time for me to give up(not that i ever did anything to try.. lol) but still i think it's a good time to stop liking him.. preferably before tomorrow when i have to see him alone to teach him econ....
as much as i want to "not" like him.... my heart felt sour when a good friend sorta started flirting with him during math today... eventhough she knew i like him... isnt that what a friend ISNT suppose to do? sigh...

i havent talked to Guy #4 for quite a long while... ~ i think it's done me some good... did my share of thinking.. and prioritizing. (did i spell that right?) o well.. i think i'm good with him being just a really good friend. a friend who is always there when i need him.. a friend who says all the right things in important times... though he cant stand me crying, he never failed come and ask what was wrong, and sometimes just sit quietly beside me, or bring friends to sit beside me and just talk to cheer me up. as far as i can remember, he's always there for me. and i like it that way... though, i'm older *just by a few months* and i should be more mature and taking care of him *haha!* it's always the other way around...
as much as he hates me crying, he is always there to hug and remind me that everything will work out soon, and that everything will be alright... one of the 5 friends who will always be there for me in a heart beat when i am down... tanja, joce, jerrick, vic and guy #4. and i know we will be Friends for life.

i love u guys all so much. ~

that's all for now fokes.
next update is probaby gonna be after all my exams which is on the 16th. talk to u guys then~
Love U!